Has been up to exploring random people’s blogs these few days, trying to run away from reading either
1 ) documentation on codes (needing a break)
2 ) pure codes so that I can finish my stupid coding task as soon as possible and go back to reading my documentation on codes (doesn’t this sounds complicating
Anyway, it was fun. I found a few people’s blogs that are interesting. It’s very nice how they could make their daily life sounds so much more interesting than how a lot of people blogged them to be. I presume it’s because their English are good, and thus somehow affected how they expressed themselves? (sad about my English, sobs)
Oh well, I think I saw this on Oi’s friend’s blog, but I can’t remember which one was it. She was writing something like
“You know you’re getting old when you saw a bunch of teenagers in school uniform walking past you and you will think ‘Kids nowadays…’ while shaking your head”
I found this very amusing because I realized that’s really how I reacted when I saw bunch of kids on buses, MRT, town area, school area, on my way home, on my way to work, wherever whenever.
I’m getting old. I’m stepping into the big 2 this coming August.
Don’t you think that there’s like a major impact when you turn from 19 to 20, 29 to 30, 39 to 40. Other birthdays aren’t that significant, who cares about “sweet 16” or whatever. “Sweet 16” reminds me of secondary school, I never understood why the girls could keep redrawing and redrawing the piece of “sweet 16” and give it to each other for umpteen times throughout the year.
I never understood why I hate my secondary time so much. Even the memory of the time then pains me so much I would have wished for an erase of my memory of that time. Even the seeing of any secondary school classmates irks me (not referring to clique people) to the extreme core.
As much as how I hated seeing secondary school people, I hate it more when they saw me first and turned away pretending we didn’t saw each other. (turned away as in really obviously turning the freaking head to the opposite direction where I am) I don’t see the need to do that because I don’t have any interest in greeting them in the first place.
Okay, back to the topic. Secondary school makes my blood boil for unknown reasons.
I’m not sad about turning to 20 though, mainly because I think 19 to 20 is not that bad, it’s like finally a kid getting older. The most exciting thing is that I’m one step closer to my big 21!! That’s a great deal to me because my dream of going into Genting’s Casino is getting nearer, I’m canceling the R21 movies though, even though it’s rated R21, it wouldn’t contain anything obscene too because after all it’s still a movie. I might as well find my sources else where (like I don’t have already).
However, the step from 29 to 30 will be a very very big impact to me. When you say you’re 29, it still ain’t seem that old, but once you stepped into 30, it felt much older. Oh well, one thing to look forward to is the living with Oi when the big 3 comes, so it’s still not that bad I guess.
As I go around reading more and more people’s blogs, I’m horrified to find out that a lot of people are under the influence of Korea media. Wherever I go I keep seeing photos of random Korean stars ( I don’t know their names ). Some belongs to Super Junior. Then I stopped reading. Don’t have the mood to continue reading from then HAHA!
Randomly saw a article on Identifying Depression on xinmsn (went there by the news article in hotmail).
I do get emotional, sometimes when I read romance novel / sad dramas / sad movies, I could get very emotional especially when the male lead die. I get very depress and down for the next few weeks.
2) Loss of interest in life
Life is meaningless, we are gonna die in 50 years time anyway, and the best thing is we will be slogging our lives off just to repay all the debts that we have made / going to make.
HDB flat money
Money for kids (if you’re planning to get one)
3) A sense of worthlessness, guilt and lack of hope
I feel worthless when I cannot finish my coding and keep getting stuck all the time.
I feel guilty when I’m watching evil ham (occasionally, still gonna watch it anyway)
I got rejected by NTU, no money to go overseas study, don’t feel like going SIM, great sense of lacking of hope currently.
4) In some incidences thoughts of death or suicide occur
Same as in 2).
5) Things and activities that were once pleasurable lose their appeal
I loved the Char Siew Mee downstairs my house but I just don’t feel like eating it anymore.
- 65 per cent report that depression is accompanied by pain
- Headaches, back ache, tender muscles and sore joints are some symptoms
I’m having a lot of headaches recently (coding…) . When I lie down on my bed, I felt back aches. (sitting for too long in front of the computer)
- Fatigue and low energy, dizziness and too much or too little sleep are also common
I’m always struggling to not fall asleep in the office. I couldn’t wake up in the morning and I’m yawning the whole day.
- Persistent nausea, diarrhoea or constipation
Diarrhoea most of the time. I think that can’t be helped since I like eating food hot and cold at the same time. Chrysanthemum tea can help constipation by the way.
Loss of sleep and weight.
I will never get depression.